Kaylee's Thoughts

Archive for February, 2012

Page One of My Novel

Hi, everyone! My awesome mother is hosting a page one critique on her blog in honor of her 200+ followers and a new author named Heather Burch. She just had her first book, Halflings, published. I saw at on the shelf for ‘New Top Teen Picks’ at Barnes and Noble yesterday! I can’t wait to read it! Mom said it was really good and she usually has good taste in books so I suggest everyone go out and buy a copy now (well, after you read my blog and leave a helpful comment of course). I wanted to play, so I started a new novel today. It is written for middle schoolers by a middle schooler:) The title is Untouchable.

Page One:

“Do I have to?” I asked. Well more like begged. I mean I didn’t want to be responsible for ending a life, even if it was just a cow. The India sun beats down upon us, a rooster too old to crow started running when he spied the shotgun on the nearby tree stump. I’m an untouchable. We do the jobs that ends lives [like fishing and slaughtering], sanitation work, dealing with meat eaters and worst of all, murdering cows then getting rid of them. So basically the jobs no one wants. Yeah, it’s officially outlawed to have untouchables in India now, but try telling that to our corner of the earth.

“Well it’s either the cow’s life or yours, Abhaya,” my older sister, Ramani, replied snappily. She’d been doing this for years now, and could honestly care less about the innocent little creatures. Of course, they’re not so little at seven hundred pounds. As long as it kept mom and dad in the house, for now anyway. Without Ramani’s help, my parents wouldn’t be able to keep the farm running. Yesterday was my twelfth birthday, no more easy chores around the house for me. Now I have to earn my keep.  “Here you go.” Ramani hands me the gun.  

I take it sadly. “Before he goes I would like to say a few words over him.” I gaze at Ramani for approval.

“Whatever Abhaya. But make it fast. After this we have to…you know…collect human waste while Mom and Dad hang the cow to bleed out.” She fake gags at the last part. Ignoring her, I start my speech.

 “We are gathered here today for the death and funeral of Bob the Cow.”

“Bob?” I glare at her. “Sorry! I’ll be quiet!”

“Bob was a good cow. He never did anything wrong. But sadly people had other ideas on his glorious life. Well I’m sorry Bob! When I kill you know that you will be reborn again. Maybe into a better life. If you do please help us. For we are the only ones who stood by you. Goodbye Bob.” Ramani watches me with fearful eyes as I fire a shot into his neck and cry. “Goodbye Bob.”

“Finally,” Ramani says acting annoyed even though I can tell she feels terrible. “Let’s go. The faster we finish the faster we go home.”

*Please, please, please with a cherry on top leave a comment! Thanks you:)

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Questions Answered keep them coming

Dear Kaylee,

I’m a wannabe writer & am struggling with my next book idea. Do you think I should write one about this snobby girl who’s forced to move to a hick town in Florida only to meet her soul-mate, a boy who can read minds (but it turns out, only hers). OR should I write one about a girl who finds out her Prom date is the actual incarnate of Jesus, & that she’s an angel herself? Thanks for your help!

Sincerely,
Wannabe Writer

Dear Wannabe Writer, Personally I think you should write about your prom date being Jesus. That could be a really good aventure book that can easily be made into an adventure movie. Yours truly Kaylee

Dear Kaylee, The valentines dance is coming up at my school and I plan on going in a group with all my friends. But the tickets are five dollars. So unless I get a date ,but I won’t because he’s in the group to, I’m going to go in a group but I don’t know how to ask them for the money because I’m already in debt to them. Desperate

Dear desperate, The perfect way to ask is on a blog. That way the whole world knows so they can’t say no. Also promise to pay off the debt. And tell them don’t worry. Yours truly desperate opps did I say desperate I meant Kaylee